Before you “bust a move” this party season, tuck a few of these tips under your Italian leather belt.

Dancing’s fun, isn’t it? And shucks, women sure do love a man that can dance. Just be warned: dancing also offers you the opportunity to completely and utterly embarrass yourself in a way you never thought possible. Think that hot single girl was flirting suggestively with you over the wedding toasts? Well, persist in doing that air-sax manoeuvre to “Careless Whisper” and you can forget about it buddy. Like penguins on land, men and dance floors generally don’t mix. Those that do defy mother nature’s unspoken order are generally eyed with suspicion. If you do take to the floor, approach with caution, and preferably without 12 units of vodka firing through your veins. Alcohol might make you brave, but it certainly doesn’t make you coordinated, and no one likes a rusty robot routine. With this in mind – some tips to get you noticed, for the right reasons.

Limbering up a little before you launch into your first move is all very well, but there can be no excuse for winding your body, clapping your hands or pouting your lips during the walk through the dinner tables to the dance floor.

You can’t dance. She knows it. You know it. Don’t try to overcompensate for your lack of floor skills by twirling and spinning your dance partner into an early grave, or worse, a vom-cano.

If you have been blessed with Latin hips, don’t rub it in the faces of those that haven’t by grabbing their girlfriends and whisking them away on your dance train. Choo! Choo! Smug dancing is almost as bad as bad dancing.