Mr David Coggins explains how to improve your behaviour and make the world a better place.

“Every time I go to an airport I feel like something’s got to change.” Mr David Coggins, author of Men And Manners, now available on MR PORTER, is explaining what inspired him to write a new book that politely suggests ways in which we might all improve our behaviour in order to make the world a better place. If Mr William Golding’s famous 1954 book, Lord Of The Flies, used boys stranded on an island to reflect on the limitations of human behaviour, then Mr Coggins feels that the way adults behave in airports and on aeroplanes is equally illuminating. “That’s where manners are usually at rock-bottom,” he says. “Where people rush onto the plane to get the last space in the overhead bin or sprawl out on the airport floor like they’re having a picnic.”

Don’t mistake Manhattan-based Mr Coggins for a curmudgeon. His mission is not to condemn others, but to inspire them. His remedy for the incivilities of air travel? “Ask a little more of yourself,” he says. “If you dress up a bit, if you go out of your way to be nice to gate agents and the security people, that helps to improve the tone.” Mr Coggins, who has a strong interest in style and has collaborated with brands including Drake’s and Sleepy Jones, always wears a blazer or sports jacket when he flies. “When I see a well-dressed man on an aeroplane I feel a little bit better about the world,” he says. What about comfort? “If we never wear anything we don’t immediately find comfortable we’d still have the same tastes we had when we were 12 or 13. I was once flying with Virgin Atlantic when they offered me a romper suit. I said, ‘No.’ The attendant looked at me as if to say, ‘Who wouldn’t want a onesie?’ I was worried I might run into someone I know.”

That last sentence gets to the very heart of the philosophical tension around dressing up. Who exactly are we dressing for? Would we be living more authentic lives if we were to prioritise comfort and worry less about impressing others? Mr Coggins doesn’t believe so. “How we dress communicates something about how we see ourselves and the world,” he says. “If you turn up to someone’s party dressed very beautifully, then you’re showing them that you’re excited about that party.” It’s easy to justify event dressing, but how about times when personal comfort is more important, like when it’s really hot in the city? “That’s a real issue for me because I feel the heat,” says Mr Coggins. “It’s a battle. Unstructured clothes are the way to go, so perhaps a linen sports coat and a light shirt, but ditch the tie and undo a couple of buttons. Or I might ditch the jacket and put on a knitted tie because I like to have made some reference to formality. I like tailored chinos, Baudoin & Lange slip-on shoes and a straw hat.” Mr Coggins is not a rule-obsessed guy, but he’s uncharacteristically severe when it comes to sandals. “I would be very happy to never again in my life see another man’s feet,” he says. “If you’re not near a swimmable body of water, then keep your toes covered.”

There’s more to manners than the clothes we wear, and technology is an area where many of us could benefit from advice. Mr Coggins is happy to oblige. “We have very powerful computers sitting in our pockets, and a lot of the things they allow us to do are wonderful,” he says. “But we need some self-control. When we’re with people, they should be the most important thing. All of the best things in life happen face to face. So if I’m meeting someone or I’m in a restaurant I try not to use my phone at the table.” How about Instagram, which he uses when travelling? “I take photos, so the phone is not away from me, but I post later in the day,” he says. “Otherwise you’re screwing around with filters and responding to likes and having the energy sucked out of you for 30 minutes. What’s the point of going somewhere if you’re not going to be in the moment while you’re there?”

Men And Manners is a gracious book that offers a polite riposte to a world in which getting ahead and getting it done have come to justify almost any level of rudeness. “The spirit of the book isn’t instruction,” says Mr Coggins. “It’s reminding us of the things we already know we should do. If you want to be the best version of yourself, a lot of good things fall into place. It’s a warm feeling and it’s attainable.”

Men And Manners: Essays, Advice And Considerations by Mr David Coggins (Abrams) is out now

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