THE JOURNAL

Illustration by Mr Simone Massoni
Want to guess your gifts this year? Here’s how with our ultimate guide.
It’s always nice to receive gifts, of course. But, as with so many other things in life, they’re often even more exciting in the abstract – ie, before you know what they’re going to be – than in actuality. Luckily, in your typical Christmas situation, you get to enjoy a bit of both worlds, thanks to the common practice of displaying wrapped presents under a tree for days, if not weeks, before the big day of unveiling itself. In fact this custom opens up the opportunity for seconds, if not minutes, of fun via the concomitant process of scooping up everything with your name on it, giving every package a shake and trying to guess what it is. Naturally we at The Daily don’t want to ruin the surprise of it all, but we thought it was high time someone treated this particular ritual to some serious, scientific scrutiny. Plus we really wanted to make some fun festive charts. Scroll down for our semi-foolproof guide to working out what’s coming your way this holiday.

CUBOID PARCELS
The most common and promising type of present, predominantly deposited by those who can’t bear the thought of messy wrapping.


SOFT AND SQUASHY PARCELS
Here be sweaters. Usually less numerous than cuboid, to the tune of one or two per person.


ODDLY-SHAPED PARCELS
The most exciting, and the most worrying. Could be anything. Approach with caution.

ANY SHAPE OR SIZE
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