Yes, we’ve all seen the memes. The mashups, the Barbenheimer yuks. Surely someone planned this? The once-in-a-generation clash of blockbuster Hollywood tentpole titans. And here they are, the two great hopes to save summer for cinema, both arriving on the same day. In the pink corner, Barbie, Ms Greta Gerwig’s gleefully knowing celebration or send-up (or both) of the 64-year-old (although she doesn’t look it!) plastic doll. And in the, um, morally grey corner, Mr Christopher Nolan’s account of the life of Professor J Robert, the theoretical physicist behind the Manhattan Project and the development of the atomic bomb. But which packs the biggest box-office punch? Or is it mutually assured destruction? Two writers square up.

Undermine Gerwig – who most recently made the astounding Little Women (while secretly pregnant) – at your own peril. The indie icon is unlikely to direct a blockbuster about an uber-materialistic doll without finding something meaningful or satirical to say. I don’t know whether Barbie will be a generational masterpiece. But through both Gerwig, and her mutually quirky Oscar-winning, co-writer husband Mr Noah Baumbach, Barbie is a hard movie to pigeonhole, which is why the satirical fantasy has caused such universal buzz.

If you’ve seen any Nolan film, you can probably guess what you’re in for with Oppenheimer, also depending on whether you thought Tenet was genius, or, as in my opinion, a bloated, overly self-gratifying mess. Yet, Barbie is so out of step with Gerwig’s previous work, it has the potential to be anything – even adult and ironic at times – and it certainly won’t be as shallow or silly as its detractors might predict.

Let’s get into the battle of the casts, then – Oppenheimer’s biggest commercial pull. Barbie boasts Ms Margot Robbie and Mr Ryan Gosling as Barbie and Ken, while Oppenheimer calls upon Messrs Cillian Murphy and Robert Downey Jr and Mses Florence Pugh and Emily Blunt. That’s an impressive ensemble. But as keen as I am to see three hours of (admittedly masterful) brooding from the Oppenheimer thesps, I’m more excited to watch how straight-faced Gosling plays loveable, blonde-tipped surfer-bro Ken. And, as stars go, Robbie can single-handedly carry a blockbuster on her own.

So, there it is. This summer will see Barbie dominate the box-office and penetrate the cultural zeitgeist. Pink will flood your social media, that Charlie XCX song will be stuck in your head and the temptation to purchase a pretty-pink suit, à la the Gos and Michael Cera on the red (pink) carpet, will creep into your subconscious. That doesn’t mean I’m any less excited to watch Oppenheimer on opening day; I’m sure it’s going to be profound. But, over the summer, most moviegoers will choose to be living through the happy, whimsical Barbie World – because when life is plastic… it’s fantastic.

“Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.” Sure, the Hindu scripture turned stark admonition by Professor J Robert Oppenheimer, father of the atomic bomb, makes for wry memes. Especially when juxtaposed against his biopic’s cinematic scheduling twin, Barbie, and a vast plume of pink smoke. But it doesn’t exactly scream summer blockbuster, does it?

Then again, the end of days is a theme that runs through the highest grossing epics of recent Hollywood history, from The Avengers to Terminator 2 via Independence Day, Armageddon and Mad Max: Fury Road. Even the Bond films, for so long the fixtures around which the Hollywood calendar is arranged, usually lean on existential crisis on a global scale to spice things up.

What we think we want in the summer is something that we don’t want to think about, and that might be the case, but what we actually desire is fear. Danger. The thrill of jeopardy. And what is Oppenheimer – the origin story of total destruction – if not a massive $200m risk?

True, Mr Christopher Nolan, the seasoned filmmaker behind this project, is himself no stranger to the blockbuster, with his Batman films lighting up respective summers – and, in The Dark Knight, a movie that similarly battled (and beat) Mamma Mia! So, a film with the potential to smoulder with “the radiance of a thousand suns” is not one to sleep on, or through.

With Inception, Interstellar and, depending on where you sit (don’t stand; it is too long for that), Tenet, Nolan has previously succeeded even without a known franchise to rely on. He has also proved that, with big-budget movies, you don’t necessarily need to park your brain at the cineplex door as you go in. However, it is how you feel when you walk out that really counts.

So, then, how will Oppenheimer hit? “Some people leave the movie absolutely devastated,” Nolan recently forewarned. “They can’t speak.” Read into that what you will. Mr Kai Bird, on whose biography American Prometheus: The Triumph And Tragedy Of J Robert Oppenheimer the film is based, left feeling “stunned”.

You should choose to see that as a good thing. The thing that you want. That woozy head fog you experience as you stagger out of a darkened cinema and try to readjust to the intense daylight of real life and its smaller, everyday concerns. Isn’t that what summer movies should be about?

Barbie will very probably burn brighter, and pinker – and, in the hands of the incredibly talented Ms Greta Gerwig, offer an entirely different flavour of smart – but perhaps it’s the long-term fallout that should concern us. The looming threat of a Mattel movie universe. A further 15 big-screen tie-ins with the toymaker and its intellectual properties are already on the cards, before we even get to the prospect of Barbie sequels.

Which is to say that both releases deserve your attention, but Oppenheimer deserves it first – if only because you will need cheering up, and watching Barbie immediately afterwards promises that. If, however, you can only watch one, remember this: Oppenheimer is, thankfully, both the beginning and the end.